I’ve played violin since age 7, and performing in orchestras, chamber groups and quartets has enriched my life immeasurably. I count my lucky stars that when we were kids, my cousin Judy, four years my senior and whom I worshipped,…
Your Comfort Zone: How You Treat It and Why It Matters
My dad was not one to dole out insightful advice. Indeed, he was far more likely to grab any opportunity to mindlessly, and tongue-in-cheek, offer up his favorite old standby: “Suffering is good for the character!”
Making Sense of the Distance Between Me and My Terminally Ill Husband
It felt so tragic! There I was, taking care of my terminally ill husband whose impending death from liver cancer had finally drawn near. But he and I had very little to say to one another. What was happening to…
What If Death Isn’t Tragic?
What if the way we’ve been conditioned to think of death is nothing more than a cultural construct? What if we can think of death in a way that makes it a neutral event in our lives, even a good…
Finding Support During My Husband’s Terminal Illness
Is support available to a widow/widower-to-be? Will the spouse/caregiver even have the time to seek help prior to their spouse’s death? Will a person in the throes of transitioning from spouse to caregiver even be receptive to a helping hand…
Getting the Support I Needed Wasn’t Always Easy
As a surviving spouse, there were times I felt utter despair, and nothing seemed like an adequate option for relieving the hopelessness. In spite of friends’ attempts to console me, at times like this no one seemed up to the…
After the Death of My Husband, My Life No Longer Had Any Meaning
How tragic, for life to suddenly lack all meaning! As a surviving spouse, I’d lost the husband and best friend with whom I could share things. Wasn’t my grief bad enough? Now everything I did left me feeling empty, to…
My Next Book – Speed Bumps
I began writing my next book, Speed Bumps – And Other Impediments to Life in the Fast Lane (Don’t you just love the title?!), long before I had any reason to write To Sam, With Love – A Surviving Spouse’s…
Covid Restrictions Complicated My Grief
Covid restrictions really messed with my “grief equilibrium.” I’d been doing so well after my husband Sam died! When Covid mandates and “lockdowns” reared their ugly heads, I quickly devised “grief plan” B, which proved only partially successful. Still, things…
A Longer View from Three-and-a-Half Years Hence
These days, as a surviving spouse I seldom feel sad when remembering Sam. I no longer stress over how fleeting the memories are, as they’ve pretty much all returned. I remember our vacations, the dishes he cooked, the happy times…
